Difference between Focusing on Problems and Focusing on Solutions

Case # 1

When NASA started launching astronauts to outer space, they found out that writing pens wouldn't work at zero gravity (ink won't flow own to the writing surface)...

To solve the problem, it took them a decade and $12 million. They developed a pen that works at zero gravity, upside down, underwater,  in practically any surface including crystal and in temperature ranging from below freezing point to over 300 degrees C. However the Russians find a simple solution...? They used pencils.

Case # 2

Another case is on Japanese management, the lesson about an empty soapbox, which really did happen in one of Japan's biggest cosmetics companies.  

The company received a complaint from a consumer who bought a soapbox that was empty. Immediately the authorities identified that the problem was with the assembly line, where soft boxes are packed and transported to The delivery department. For some reason, one soapbox went through the assembly line empty. Management asked its engineers to solve the problem. Post-haste, the engineers worked hard to devise an X-ray machine with high-resolution monitors manned by two people to watch all the soapboxes passing through the assembly line to make sure they were not empty. They did it but spent a whooping amount to make it. Similar case was compared... and this was taken from the accounts of a small company. When a supervisor of the small company was confronted With the same problem, he did not get into complications of X-rays, etc., but instead came out with another solution. He bought a strong industrial electric fan and pointed it directly to the assembly line. When the fan was switched on, it simply blew the passing empty boxes out from the packing area of the assembly line.

Lesson from the story. Always look for simple solutions.

Devise the simplest possible solution that could easily (and economically) solve the problem.

We are always confronted by problems in our everyday life... at home, at work and social life. What really matters is HOW ONE LOOK AT THE

PROBLEM...

Focus more on Solutions and not on problems!!!

Appraisal Vs Resignation

A newly joined trainee engineer asks his boss "what is the meaning of appraisal?"

Boss: "Do you know the meaning of resignation?"

Trainee: "Yes I do"

Boss: "So let me make you understand what an appraisal is by comparing it with resignation"

Comparison study: Appraisal and Resignation

Appraisal	Resignation
In appraisal meeting, they will    speak only about your weakness,   errors, and failures.	In resignation meeting, they will speak only about your strengths, past achievements and success.
In appraisal, you may need to cry and beg for even 10% hike.	In resignation you can easily demand (or get even without asking) more than 50-60% hike.
During appraisal, they will deny promotion saying you did not meet the expectation, you do not have   leadership qualities, and you had several drawbacks in our objective/goal.	During resignation, they will say you are the core member of team; you are the vision of the company how can you go, you have to take the project in   shoulder and lead your juniors to success.
There is 90% chance for not getting any significant incentives after appraisal.	There is 90% chance of getting immediate hike after you put the resignation.

20 Money Hacks: Tips and Tricks to Improve Your Finances

    "Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons." - Woody Allen

We had the Parent Hacks earlier this week, and I was thinking it would be fun to do the same with finances — ways to trick yourself, to get around obstacles, to boost your accounts, without it hurting.

Improving your finances improves your happiness, in general, so I thought it would be important to share stuff that's worked for me.

I'm in the best financial shape in my life, despite quitting my job and my wife recently quitting hers too. A lot of that is thanks to you guys, the readers, but it's also thanks to frugality, to eliminating debt, to saving as much as I can. To these hacks.

Here's what works for me — please avoid flaming me, as I'm not saying they'll work for everybody. Share your tips and tricks in the comments!

• Use cash. Instead of charging things to credit cards or debit cards, use cash for non-bill spending such as eating out, gas, groceries. Spending cash makes the spending more real, and there's an added advantage of knowing when you're out of cash, instead of spending more than you
• Small weekly savings transfers. I got this idea from my friend Trent at The Simple Dollar, who automatically deducts $20 a week from his check to savings. I decided that I could live with $40/week without really feeling it — it's a relatively small transfer that I barely notice, and I save about $2,000 a year on top of my larger bi-weekly savings transfers.
• Stay home. Going out makes you more likely to spend unnecessarily. You eat at restaurants, go to the mall, stop at the gas station for snacks. It's hard to avoid spending when you're on the road. Instead, stay home, and find free entertainment. It's also a great way to bond with your family.
• Don't get catalogs. Or emailed announcements from companies trying to sell you stuff. Their announcements of sales or cool new products make it very tempting to buy something you don't need. Instead, stop the catalogs and emails from ever getting to you in the first place, and you'll spend less.
• Keep a 30-day list. If you have an impulse to buy something you don't absolutely need, put it on a 30-day list. You can't buy anything but necessities — everything else goes on the list, with the date that it's added to the list. When the 30 days are up, you can buy it — but most likely, the strong urge to buy it will be gone, and you can evaluate it more calmly.
• Cook at home. I know, it seems more difficult than eating out. But it doesn't have to be hard. Throw together a quick stir-fry with frozen veggies and either boneless chicken or (my favorite) tofu with soy sauce or tamari. Make home-made pizza with a ready-made crust, some sauce, cheese and veggies. Put some spices on something and throw it in the oven while you cook some brown rice. Not only is this much cheaper than eating out, but it's healthier.
• Exercise. Staying healthy is the best way to avoid costly medical bills later.
• Use the envelope system. It's the same idea as using cash for spending, but in addition you use envelopes to split your spending cash into categories. My non-bills categories are groceries, gas and miscellaneous spending. Three envelopes, and when they're empty, I've spent my allotment.
• Talk with your SO weekly. It's important that you and your significant other be on the same page. You should have the same financial goals, and from there you should agree on a general spending plan and a policy for impulse buying that won't have either of you wanting to choke the other. Make sure you both know what bills have been paid, what your balances are, etc. A weekly meeting of just 20 minutes accomplishes that. Communication is key.
• The spreadsheet tracker hack. There are expensive programs like MS Money, Quicken, and the like that will do amazing things with your financial information. There are even free ones, on your desktop or online, that can do all kinds of things. Trouble is, I don't need all that. All I want is a way to track my money easily, with no other bells and whistles, and a way to access that online so that I can view it from anywhere. The best way I found to do that is through Google Docs and Spreadsheets. I created a simple spreadsheet to track my bank accounts, that does everything I used to do with MS Money. It has the date of each transaction, the title and amount, a little field for memos, and a running balance. What more do I need? Keep it simple. Update: View a sample I put online here.
• Pay savings and debt first. When you sit down to pay your bills (I do them all online), make the first bills you pay be your savings transfer and your debt payments. If not, if you pay them last … you'll often end up shortchanging them. But if you pay them first, you'll make sure you still pay your rent or mortgage, utilities, groceries and gas … so you'll just cut back on other spending.
• Exercise at home. Some of you will disagree with me on this, which is OK — everyone should do what works for them. But I've saved a lot of money that I used to spend on gyms by just running at the local track or on the roads in my neighborhood, and buying some simple weights and a chin-up bar. I do a lot of body-weight exercises (pushups, Hindu squats, lunges, pullups, dips, etc.) and I don't need a gym for those things.
• Cut out cable TV. I'm not saying I don't watch TV — I watch DVDs, so that I'm sure that what I'm watching is something great, rather than the useless stuff you find on TV most of the time. And there's a lot of it online for free if you look. Not a huge savings, but it adds up.
• Declutter. By getting rid of all the excess stuff in your home, you not only make your life much simpler and more peaceful, but you make it harder to buy stuff that will just clutter things up again. Once you've simplified your home, you won't want to go back.
• Lend and borrow. Give books and clothes and toys you don't need anymore to your friends and family. If you need something, send out an email asking if anyone has it. Chances are, they'll give it to you for free if they don't use it anymore.
• Barter. It's a lost art, but lots of people will take your services or goods instead of money, especially if you're friends or at least know each other. Get into the habit of offering to barter, and you'll find yourself saving a lot of money. My website design was done through the barter system, so I saved well over $1,000 there, for example.
• Use online savings. I use Emigrant Direct, but IMG Online is also popular, as are a bunch of other online banks. Not only do you earn like twice the interest of a normal bank savings account, but if you don't get the ATM account it's not as easy to withdraw money … making it less likely that you'll get money out on an impulse. Read more at Get Rich Slowly.
• Try frugal gift-giving. Giving people gifts is one of the most wonderful traditions, as it shows generosity and caring. Until it becomes commercialized. Then it's just really really expensive. Instead, try giving the gift of spending time with someone. Try giving them something you baked or made yourself. Try giving them services they'd appreciate. It doesn't have to cost a lot to be generous.
• Teach your kids about advertising, saving, earning, and gift-giving. If you have kids, educating them about money will save you a lot of money in the long run. If they know about how advertising influences them in tricky ways, they'll be less likely to demand (OK, beg and plead for) the latest fad toys. If they know about saving and earning money, they'll respect the money that you earn, and that you are trying to save. If they know that gift-giving doesn't have to be about spending a lot of money (see above), they won't necessarily want expensive stuff.
• Find happiness in life, not spending. Many times people buy stuff because they think (subconsciously perhaps) that it will bring them happiness. They just HAVE to have the latest gadget or shoes or cars. It's so fun! And yet, you buy that stuff, and you're only happy for a day or two at most. Then you just need to buy more. It's a never-ending cycle. Instead, learn to love life. Find joy in nature! In the people around you! In doing something you love! In exercise and meditation! There's so much in life to make us happy, there's no need to find it in spending.

    "I'd like to live as a poor man with lots of money." - Pablo Picasso

Source- Zenhabits    (subscribe to Zenhabits)

Ecological Story- Delhi has 202 bird species

Delhi has 202 bird species

They come from different walks of life - some architects, some graphic designers, some retired Armymen, some entrepreneurs and some even Class V students.

But last Sunday, this myriad Group spoke one common language - that of Mynahs, Shovellers, Mallards and Common Coots, not to mention Spot Bill Ducks, Little Grebes and the Common Moorhen.

It was a big event for this unique group of citizens who met in the Capital on February 24 to celebrate the Big Bird Day and in their own passionate way chronicle the number of species they spotted in day-long team walks in the forested areas of the city.

"I am proud to announce that this year we touched the record figure of 500 birders and also a healthy bird count of 202 species ," Bikram Grewal, a bird author and this year's official scorer, announced over dinner.

But the healthy count came with growing concerns which the birders talked of at length - like the vanishing Dadri wetland where rare species nestle. "It is fast drying up and in a year's time will be lost to us," announced Anand Arya who single-handedly handled 137 species, three less than the highest score.

As members recounted their day out, Grewal said it was overall a fruitful day which came with its own set of hits and misses. While some of Delhi's common birds decided to play truant, some rare ones presented themselves at spots you would least expect, the Eurasian Curlew, probably the first image from Dadri Wetland. "Not one but three sightings," said a proud Arya.

Then there was this gutsy black-shouldered kite who fought with a flock of biggies to save its prey. "She was attacked from all sides but did not give up even once. We finally waded though the wheat crop and found her lying dormant - but with the prey still in its beak. As soon as we got nearer, it zoomed up and flew away," recounted Arya as the members applauded the bird's gutsy determination unanimously.

The Delhi Bird Group, though having its origins in the 1950s when British national Michael Hutton established the initiative, is today a committed and fast expanding entity of 3000 members which went online in 2001 and meets regularly to compare notes, discuss the state of Delhi's birds and talk about the depleting resources which are hitting the 500 bird species of the Capital.

Few capitals in the world, these birders tells you, are blessed with such rich and diverse bird-life as Delhi is, coming as it does close to the most birded capital in the world, Nairobi. Delhi's avian visitors have always fascinated citizens. But it is only in the past few years that bird watching has become full fledged activity among the young and the old alike.

Last Sunday, the Delhi Bird Group, along with WWF India, set up a dozen teams of birders for a day-long bird walk covering Delhi Zoo, Asola, Tughlakabad, Yamuna, Khadar, Sanjay Van, Ridge area, the Yamuna Bio Diversity Park, Dadri, Sultanpur, KG Wetlands, Sonepat, Aravali Biodiversity Park, Hauz Khas Lake and the JNU.

"The idea was to spot as many species in and around Delhi," said Nikhil Devasar who revamped the Delhi Bird Group in 2000. The count of bird species was 236 in 2006, 188 in 2007 and an improved tally of 202 this year.

"The number of birds is declining in Delhi. At least such walks boost awareness," said Dr Surya Prakash, an avid bird watcher from Life Sciences department of JNU where he led the team of birders in spotting 68 species.

Spread over 13.8 sq km, "the Jawaharlal Nehru University is home to 127 species, including migratory beauties like Black Redstart, BlueThroat, Red Throated Fly Catcher, Lesser White Throat and residential rarities like Yellow Wattled Lapwing, Alexandrine Parakeets, Plum Headed Parakeets, Sirkeer Malkoha, Common Hawk, Cuckoo and the Grey Indian Hornbill which are hardly seen in any other part of Delhi.

But these days, they are enjoying an extended winter and spring season along with 65 species of butterflies on the campus," said Dr Prakash while ealking a group of spotters through the heavily forested areas of JNU like the Parthasarthy Rock, the Aravali Guest House and the heavily forested areas of JNU like the Parthasarthy Rock, Open-air theatre, JNU stadium, the academic complex and the Check Dam.

Fog in certain areas may have kept visibility low but areas like Sultanpur which recorded the highest spotting of 140 species and the robust chirps in Hauz Khas Lake made up for the day with wonderful spottings like that of the white breasted waterhen and the stone curlew, along with Mallards and ducks snooping around in the placid lake.

Amongst the special birds seen were a juvenile White-tailed Eagle in Sultanpur and Yellow-legged Gull in OBP. Several common species like the jacanas were conspicuous by their absence.

The team that had the highest score was led by Abhijit Menon Sen who covered the Sultanpur area and notched up 140 species. Abhijits tally was 6 short of Peter Jacksons " A Days worth of Delhi Birds" on the 1st of March 1970.

Out of the 1200 species of birds found in India, Delhi is the proud home to around 500. The most significant area in the city is the Okhla Barrage, adjudged "Important Bird Area" by Birdlife International as it holds over 20,000 waterbirds in winter and has a bird list exceeding 330 species.

Bird recording in Delhi dates back to the 19th century. The first birding club, the Delhi Birdwatching Society, was formed in 1950 by Michael Hutton which continued into the 1970s. In the 1970s Tony Gaston was the most serious birder who did a specific study on Delhi Ridge birds. In the 1980s, the Oriental Bird Club was formed specifically to provide a publication of bird records. In the 1990s, bird trip reports started getting posted on the Internet and, thus, became more accessible to common citizens. By 2000, the Delhi Bird Club was revamped as an email-based group which set up its own website in 2001.

The emerging hotspots, members said, were the upcoming Aravali Biodiversity Park in Vasant Vihar & Yamuna Biodiversity Park in Wazirabad. Others talked of the streaming cranes and the red storks which made their day.

And as the annual ritual got close to winding up after a sumptuous dinner, there was a collective pledge to "being with the birds" till next year and a call to "get up, pick up your camera and binocs and start adventuring."

 

Source- Economics Times

Lingo Bingo

School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.
Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.
Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills
Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.
Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine water power.
Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through 'the minds of either'
Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.
Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.
Criminal: A guy no different from the rest....except that he got caught.
Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.
Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not read.
Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise after death.

Email Zen: Clear Out Your Inbox - Ah! Empty Email inbox

Email Zen: Clear Out Your Inbox

This post was provided by Zenhabits

I use Gmail exclusively for email, and it constitutes a major part of my two day jobs. I get a fair amount of email each hour, and I am pretty quick at responding.

However, one thing you'll notice about my Gmail inbox is that it is just about always empty.

It gives me a Zen feeling to have a clean inbox, a feeling of peace and calm and satisfaction. I highly recommend it to everyone. I wasn't always like this — I had many emails in my inbox in the past. They would sit in there, sometimes unread, sometimes just waiting on an action, sometimes waiting to be filed, and others just waiting because I was procrastinating. I also had many folders for filing my email, so I could find them when I needed them. It would take me awhile to file sometimes, so I would put it off. Many people I know are the same way.

But GTD changed that (as well as 43 Folders and others), and for nearly a year now, I've been fairly consistent about having a clean inbox.

Here are my simple steps to achieving Email Zen:

1) Don't check email first thing in the morning, or have it constantly on. This is a tip offered by many blogs, so nothing new here. Checking email first thing will get you stuck in email for awhile. Instead, do your most important thing for the day, or the thing you've been procrastinating on the most. Then check email. Better yet, do 2 or 3 things first. Also, if you are constantly checking email throughout the day, or it notifies you as soon as an email comes in, you will be constantly distracted and not able to focus on the task before you. I check once an hour, but you might have different needs.

2) When you check your email, dispose of each one, one at a time, right away. Make a decision on what needs to be done on each email.

2a) Is it junk or some forwarded email? Trash it immediately.

2b) Is it a long email that you just need to read for information? File it in a Read folder (or tag it Read and archive) or print it to read on the road (while waiting in line, for example).

2c) If the email requires action, make a note of the action on your to-do or GTD lists to do later. Also note to check the email for info if necessary. Then archive the email. You can easily find it later when you need to do that task.

2d) If you can respond to it in a minute or two, do so immediately. Don't put it off. If you wait, you'll end up with a backlog of emails to respond to, and you may never get around to it. I respond quickly, with a short note, and send it right away. That way I'm viewed as responsive and on top of things.

2e) If you need to follow up on the email later, or are waiting for a response, note it on a Waiting For list. Don't just leave it in your inbox as a reminder.

3) I have only one folder: Archive. When I respond to an email, or finish reading it if it doesn't need response, or note it on my to-do list, I archive it. Simple as that. You could add a Read folder if you want. I usually print longer ones to read later, like during lunch or while waiting for something. Other people have an Action folder or a Waiting For folder, but I find that that's just an additional inbox (or "bucket" as GTD's David Allen calls it) that you have to constantly check. I don't like to check extra folders. I have my to-do lists and my Waiting For list, and that's good enough. So it's as simple as pressing "Archive" on an email, and if I need to find it later, Gmail's search is so good that it's easy to find. I've never had any problems with this system.

Email Zen is that easy: check email at regular periods, take action on each email right away (or note it on a list to do later) and archive.

Ahhh. Empty inbox!

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How to Actually Execute Your To-Do List: or, Why Writing It Down Doesn’t Actually Get It Done

How to Actually Execute Your To-Do List: or, Why Writing It Down Doesn't Actually Get It Done

This post was provided by Zenhabits

Have you gotten good at organizing your tasks in a to-do list, but have trouble actually executing them? You're not alone.

Getting things on your to-do list actually done is difficult because it's really a collection of habits that most people don't think about. Today, we'll look at addressing those issues that stop you from doing things, and the habits needed to overcome those issues.

This post was prompted when reader BJ Thunderstone recently asked a great question:

    A lot of productivity systems such as Getting Things Done by David Allen or Do It Tomorrow by Mark Forster concern themselves with writing lists of things to do. This skill is easy to learn.But what if the problem isn't making lists, but executing your plan? What if you write "Get X, Y and Z done" and then you can't make yourself do any of these things?

    I think that many people have a problem not with making to-do lists - but with executing what is written on these lists.

B.J. went on to list some of the reasons he and others have a problem getting things done. Let's address them one by one.

"I feel resistance when starting work on something."

First of all, it's good to analyze your resistance, which is something we don't do often. Why don't you want to start on something? Identifying the problem can help lead to the solution.

 

Having said that, there are a couple of suggestions that could help:

 

    * Tiny chunk. Tell yourself you only have to do 5 minutes of work on it. That small amount of work is less intimidating.

    * Just start. Once you get going, it's much easier to keep going. So tell yourself that all you have to do is start. I like to compare this to my philosophy of running: instead of worrying about having to do the whole run, I tell myself that I just have to lace up my shoes and get out the door. After that, it's really easy. Do the same thing with any task — just fire up your program, and do the first few actions (i.e. start typing). It gets easier after that point.

    * Reward yourself. Don't let yourself check email (or whatever reward works for you — something that you need to do every day) until you do at least 10 minutes (or 15 or 20, it doesn't matter) on the task. Set a timer. Once your 10 minutes is up, set another timer for 5 minutes and do email. Then repeat.

    * Get excited about it. This is actually a tip that helps with any of these points. If you are excited about doing something, you will not hesitate to do it. For example, I loved this topic suggestion, and I was excited about writing it. As soon as I had the chance, I sat down to write it and only took one break. But how do you get excited about a task? Try to find something exciting about it. Will it bring you revenue? What can you do with that revenue? Will it bring you new clients, new opportunities, new recognition? If you can't find anything exciting about a task, consider whether it's really important or not — and if not, find a way to not do it. Sometimes eliminating (or delegating or delaying) the task is the best option.

 

"I am terrified of certain tasks, or of working on certain projects."

There are usually a few reasons those tasks or projects terrify you:

 

   1. They are too intimidating in size or scope. To combat this, break it down into tinier chunks — actually, just the first tiny chunk (as David Allen tells us to do in GTD). It's intimidating to do a task like "Create report on X" or "Make a yearly plan for Z". But if you just need to do the first physical action, which might be, "Call Frank for figures on X" or "Make a list of 10 things we should accomplish this year", it's much easier to tackle and less intimidating.

   2. You don't really know how to do it. If you haven't done something a million times before, it is unfamiliar and unknown to you. And we are all terrified of that. The solution? First, get more information — learn as much as you can about it. That might require some research on the Internet, or talking to someone who's done it before, or reading a book, or taking a class. Whatever you need to do, make the unknown become the known. Second, practice it as much as possible. Once you've learned how to do something, you need to practice it to become good at it. Don't practice the whole thing — practice individual skills required to do a task or project, one at a time, until you're good at those skills. Once you've mastered them, it will no longer be terrifying.

   3. You are focusing on negative aspects. You might be focusing on how hard something is, or on all the obstacles. Try looking at the positive aspects instead. Focus on what a great opportunity this project represents … an opportunity to learn, to get better at something, to make more money, to work on a relationship, to gain some long-term recognition, to improve your advancement opportunities. This is similar to the "get excited about it" item in the previous section. If you look at the opportunities, not the problems, you will be less terrified and more likely to want to do it.

 

"I start, but I get distracted and never finish."

If you start, you've already made a big step towards finishing. Now you just need to work on the distractions. My suggestions won't be popular, but they work:

 

    * Small tasks. I mentioned this above, but it's really important to repeat here. If you are getting distracted, it may be because you are working too long on a single task or project. To remain focused, do only a small task — you are more likely to stay on task. If the task takes a long time, focus on only doing 15-20 minutes of it.

    * Single-task. Don't allow yourself to do multiple tasks at the same time. Just do the one task before you. If you tend to do email, IM, surf the web, read your RSS feeds, talk on the phone and all of that while doing a task, you will inevitably be distracted from a task. Do one task at a time. If you feel yourself being pulled from the task, stop yourself. And bring yourself back.

    * Unplug. The biggest distractions come from connectivity. Email, feeds, IM, Twitter, phones. Unplug from these connections while you're working on your single task. This is always an unpopular suggestion, but before you reject it, give it a try. Turn everything off, and try to focus on one task. You'll get a lot more done, I guarantee you. Right now, I'm writing this post while disconnected from the Internet. It's much easier to concentrate.

    * Clear your desk. Distractions can come from visual clutter. It can be worth it to clear everything off your desk (see 3 Steps to a Permanently Clear Desk). Also clear your walls and your computer desktop, and only work on one program at a time if possible.

    * Focus. Once your desk is clear and you unplug, and you're working on that single task, really put all of your concentration on it. Pour your energies into that task, and see if you can get it done quickly. You might even get lost in it, and achieve that highly touted (deservedly so) state of mind known as "flow".

    * Take breaks. It can help you to focus for a short amount of time on a single task, and use a time to help you focus, and then to take a break. This allows you to reboot your brain. Then, get back to work and focus on the next task.

 

"I often don't feel like doing any work at all. The idea of work seems horrible and I never start doing anything."

I know this feeling well. It plagues us all, and there's no one good answer. However, here are some suggestions:

 

    * Groom yourself. If you work from home, take a shower. Often the act of grooming ourselves can make us feel much better.

    * Take a walk. I find that a little walk can get my blood pumping, refresh my mind, and allow me to think about what I really want to do today. It might not be what you need, but it's worth a shot.

    * Exercise. Similarly, exercise can make you feel great. A jog in the park, a short strength workout, some pilates, or meditation … these things get your mood up and get you feeling productive and happy. Try it out — you might feel more like doing stuff when you're done.

    * Again, think of opportunities. Think about tomorrow — not tomorrow as in the distant future, but tomorrow as in the day after today. Imagine yourself looking back on today from tomorrow. Will you be glad you laid around? Or would you be happier if you did something, and took advantage of the opportunities in front of you today? It's useful to think in terms of your future self — because what we do today will open up opportunities and new roads for tomorrow's us.

    * Baby steps. Don't think in terms of having to tackle an entire work day, or an entire list of stuff to do. That's overwhelming. Just think of doing one thing. That's all you have to do — just that one thing. Make it something small and easy, and ideally something fun and rewarding. Focus on that easy task. Once you get started, you might be more willing to do another thing. Then another.

    * Find fun stuff to do. If you just have boring or unpleasant things to do, you won't feel like doing them. Instead, change your path for today — see if you can find something that's fun or exciting, but still moves you forward on a project or goal. That might be what you need to get you jump-started to do other stuff — or you might instead only spend the day doing only fun stuff (as long as it moves you forward — don't just play solitaire or WoW).

    * Commit thyself. If motivation is your problem, commit yourself to making some progress with a goal or project today, or every day this week — tell all your family and friends, write it in your blog, or join the Zen Habits forum — it's a great motivator. Then hold yourself accountable by reporting to others what you did today.

    * Rewards. Tell yourself that if you just do that first task, you'll get a nice ice cream sundae. Or that you can buy a book, or DVD. Whatever your reward, use it to motivate yourself to just get started. Then let the rest flow from there.

"I make a list of things to do the next day.. and on that day, I wake up looking forward to a bad day, full of unpleasant tasks, I don't feel like doing anything from the list."

Two things to say here:

   1. Overload. The most probable reason is that you're overloading yourself. People tend to pile too much on themselves for a single day, overestimating how much they can actually do. Get into the habit of choosing only three Most Important Tasks to do for the day, and do them early in the day (at least two of them before email). If you only have three things to do, it's not overwhelming. You'll probably have some smaller things to do later, but write those down under a "batch process" heading, and do those small things all at once near the end of the day.

   2. Fun. The second thing is that you're loading yourself up with unpleasant tasks. Who wants to face a day of that? Instead, put down tasks that you'll look forward to doing. Create an exciting to-do list for tomorrow. If you really have nothing important to do that's enjoyable, it's possible you're in the wrong job. Look instead for a job that you'll actually enjoy. Yes, every job has unpleasant and difficult tasks, but they lead to something rewarding. They support something you get excited about. If you don't have anything like that in your job, you need to take a closer look at your job — revamp it somehow, or look for another.

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Get Off Your Butt: 16 Ways to Get Motivated When You’re in a Slump

Get Off Your Butt: 16 Ways to Get Motivated When You're in a Slump

This post was provided by Zenhabits

Even the most motivated of us — you, me, Tony Robbins — can feel unmotivated at times. In fact, sometimes we get into such a slump that even thinking about making positive changes seems too difficult.

But it's not hopeless: with some small steps, baby ones in fact, you can get started down the road to positive change.

Yes, I know, it seems impossible at times. You don't feel like doing anything. I've been there, and in fact I still feel that way from time to time. You're not alone. But I've learned a few ways to break out of a slump, and we'll take a look at those today.

This post was inspired by reader Roy C. Carlson, who asked:

    "I was wondering if you could do a piece on why it can be hard for someone to change direction and start taking control of their life. I have to say I'm in this boat and advice on getting out of my slump would be great."

Roy is just one of many with a slump like that. Again, I feel that way sometimes myself, and in fact sometimes I struggle to motivate myself to exercise — and I'll use that as an example of how to break out of the slump.

When I fall out of exercise, due to illness or injury or disruption from things going on in my life, it's hard to get started again. I don't even feel like thinking about it, sometimes. But I've always found a way to break out of that slump, and here are some things I've learned that have helped:

   1. One Goal. Whenever I've been in a slump, I've discovered that it's often because I have too much going on in my life. I'm trying to do too much. And it saps my energy and motivation. It's probably the most common mistake that people make: they try to take on too much, try to accomplish too many goals at once. You cannot maintain energy and focus (the two most important things in accomplishing a goal) if you are trying to do two or more goals at once. It's not possible — I've tried it many times. You have to choose one goal, for now, and focus on it completely. I know, that's hard. Still, I speak from experience. You can always do your other goals when you've accomplished your One Goal.

   2. Find inspiration. Inspiration, for me, comes from others who have achieved what I want to achieve, or who are currently doing it. I read other blogs, books, magazines. I Google my goal, and read success stories. Zen Habits is just one place for inspiration, not only from me but from many readers who have achieved amazing things.

   3. Get excited. This sounds obvious, but most people don't think about it much: if you want to break out of a slump, get yourself excited about a goal. But how can you do that when you don't feel motivated? Well, it starts with inspiration from others (see above), but you have to take that excitement and build on it. For me, I've learned that by talking to my wife about it, and to others, and reading as much about it as possible, and visualizing what it would be like to be successful (seeing the benefits of the goal in my head), I get excited about a goal. Once I've done that, it's just a matter of carrying that energy forward and keeping it going.

   4. Build anticipation. This will sound hard, and many people will skip this tip. But it really works. It helped me quit smoking after many failed attempts. If you find inspiration and want to do a goal, don't start right away. Many of us will get excited and want to start today. That's a mistake. Set a date in the future — a week or two, or even a month — and make that your Start Date. Mark it on the calendar. Get excited about that date. Make it the most important date in your life. In the meantime, start writing out a plan. And do some of the steps below. Because by delaying your start, you are building anticipation, and increasing your focus and energy for your goal.

   5. Post your goal. Print out your goal in big words. Make your goal just a few words long, like a mantra ("Exercise 15 mins. Daily"), and post it up on your wall or refrigerator. Post it at home and work. Put it on your computer desktop. You want to have big reminders about your goal, to keep your focus and keep your excitement going. A picture of your goal (like a model with sexy abs, for example) also helps.

   6. Commit publicly. None of us likes to look bad in front of others. We will go the extra mile to do something we've said publicly. For example, when I wanted to run my first marathon, I started writing a column about it in my local daily newspaper. The entire island of Guam (pop. 160K) knew about my goal. I couldn't back down, and even though my motivation came and went, I stuck with it and completed it. Now, you don't have to commit to your goal in your daily newspaper, but you can do it with friends and family and co-workers, and you can do it on your blog if you have one. And hold yourself accountable — don't just commit once, but commit to giving progress updates to everyone every week or so.

   7. Think about it daily. If you think about your goal every day, it is much more likely to become true. To this end, posting the goal on your wall or computer desktop (as mentioned above) helps a lot. Sending yourself daily reminders also helps. And if you can commit to doing one small thing to further your goal (even just 5 minutes) every single day, your goal will almost certainly come true.

   8. Get support. It's hard to accomplish something alone. When I decided to run my marathon, I had the help of friends and family, and I had a great running community on Guam who encouraged me at 5K races and did long runs with me. When I decided to quit smoking, I joined an online forum and that helped tremendously. And of course, my wife Eva helped every step of the way. I couldn't have done these goals without her, or without the others who supported me. Find your support network, either in the real world or online, or both.

   9. Realize that there's an ebb and flow. Motivation is not a constant thing that is always there for you. It comes and goes, and comes and goes again, like the tide. But realize that while it may go away, it doesn't do so permanently. It will come back. Just stick it out and wait for that motivation to come back. In the meantime, read about your goal (see below), ask for help (see below), and do some of the other things listed here until your motivation comes back.

  10. Stick with it. Whatever you do, don't give up. Even if you aren't feeling any motivation today, or this week, don't give up. Again, that motivation will come back. Think of your goal as a long journey, and your slump is just a little bump in the road. You can't give up with every little bump. Stay with it for the long term, ride out the ebbs and surf on the flows, and you'll get there.

  11. Start small. Really small. If you are having a hard time getting started, it may be because you're thinking too big. If you want to exercise, for example, you may be thinking that you have to do these intense workouts 5 days a week. No — instead, do small, tiny, baby steps. Just do 2 minutes of exercise. I know, that sounds wimpy. But it works. Commit to 2 minutes of exercise for one week. You may want to do more, but just stick to 2 minutes. It's so easy, you can't fail. Do it at the same time, every day. Just some crunches, 2 pushups, and some jogging in place. Once you've done 2 minutes a day for a week, increase it to 5, and stick with that for a week. In a month, you'll be doing 15-20. Want to wake up early? Don't think about waking at 5 a.m. Instead, think about waking 10 minutes earlier for a week. That's all. Once you've done that, wake 10 minutes earlier than that. Baby steps.

  12. Build on small successes. Again, if you start small for a week, you're going to be successful. You can't fail if you start with something ridiculously easy. Who can't exercise for 2 minutes? (If that's you, I apologize.) And you'll feel successful, and good about yourself. Take that successful feeling and build on it, with another baby step. Add 2-3 minutes to your exercise routine, for example. With each step (and each step should last about a week), you will feel even more successful. Make each step really, really small, and you won't fail. After a couple of months, your tiny steps will add up to a lot of progress and a lot of success.

  13. Read about it daily. When I lose motivation, I just read a book or blog about my goal. It inspires me and reinvigorates me. For some reason, reading helps motivate and focus you on whatever you're reading about. So read about your goal every day, if you can, especially when you're not feeling motivated.

  14. Call for help when your motivation ebbs. Having trouble? Ask for help. Email me. Join an online forum. Get a partner to join you. Call your mom. It doesn't matter who, just tell them your problems, and talking about it will help. Ask them for advice. Ask them to help you overcome your slump. It works.

  15. Think about the benefits, not the difficulties. One common problem is that we think about how hard something is. Exercise sounds so hard! Just thinking about it makes you tired. But instead of thinking about how hard something is, think about what you will get out of it. For example, instead of thinking about how tiring exercise can be, focus on how good you'll feel when you're done, and how you'll be healthier and slimmer over the long run. The benefits of something will help energize you.

  16. Squash negative thoughts; replace them with positive ones. Along those lines, it's important to start monitoring your thoughts. Recognize negative self-talk, which is really what's causing your slump. Just spend a few days becoming aware of every negative thought. Then, after a few days, try squashing those negative thoughts like a bug, and then replacing them with a corresponding positive thought. Squash, "This is too hard!" and replace it with, "I can do this! If that wimp Leo can do it, so can I!" It sounds corny, but it works. Really.

 

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Top 20 Motivation Hacks

Top 20 Motivation Hacks - An Overview

This post was provided by Zenhabits

For the last two weeks I've been posting the Top 20 Motivation Hacks, one by one. These are the tips and tricks that, if used in combination, are a nearly sure way to achieve your goals.

Achieving goals is not a matter of having "discipline". It's a matter of motivating yourself, and keeping your focus on your goal. Follow these hacks, or any combination of them that works for you, and you should have the motivation and focus you need.

Here they are, in reverse order (links take you to more on each):

#20: Chart Your Progress. Recently I posted about how I created a chart to track my progress with each of my goals. This chart is not just for information purposes, for me to look back and see how I'm doing. It's to motivate me to keep up with my goals. If I'm diligent about checking my chart every day, and marking dots or "x"s, then I will want to make sure I fill it with dots. I will think to myself, "I better do this today if I want to mark a dot." Well, that's a small motivation, but it helps, trust me. Some people prefer to use gold stars. Others have a training log, which works just as well. Or try Joe's Goals. However you do it, track your progress, and allow yourself a bit of pride each time you give yourself a good mark.

Now, you will have some bad marks on your chart. That's OK. Don't let a few bad marks stop you from continuing. Strive instead to get the good marks next time.

#19: Hold Yourself Back. When I start with a new exercise program, or any new goal really, I am rarin' to go. I am full of excitement, and my enthusiasm knows no boundaries. Nor does my sense of self-limitation. I think I can do anything. It's not long before I learn that I do have limitations, and my enthusiasm begins to wane.

Well, a great motivator that I've learned is that when you have so much energy at the beginning of a program, and want to go all out — HOLD BACK. Don't let yourself do everything you want to do. Only let yourself do 50-75 percent of what you want to do. And plan out a course of action where you slowly increase over time. For example, if I want to go running, I might think I can run 3 miles at first. But instead of letting myself do that, I start by only running a mile. When I'm doing that mile, I'll be telling myself that I can do more! But I don't let myself. After that workout, I'll be looking forward to the next workout, when I'll let myself do 1.5 miles. I keep that energy reined in, harness it, so that I can ride it even further.

#18: Join an online (or off-line) group to help keep you focused and motivated. When I started to run, more than a year ago, I joined a few different forums, at different times, on different sites, such as Men's Health (the Belly-Off Runner's Club), Runner's World, Cool Running, and the running group at About.com. I did the same when I was quitting smoking.

Each time I joined a forum, it helped keep me on track. Not only did I meet a bunch of other people who were either going through what I was going through or who had already been through it, I would report my progress (and failures) as I went along. They were there for great advice, for moral support, to help keep me going when I wanted to stop.

#17: Post a picture of your goal someplace visible — near your desk or on your refrigerator, for example. Visualizing your goal, exactly how you think it will be when you've achieved it, whether it's financial goals like traveling to Rome or building a dream house, or physical goals like finishing a marathon or getting a flat stomach, is a great motivator and one of the best ways of actualizing your goals.

Find a magazine photo or a picture online and post it somewhere where you can see it not only daily, but hourly if possible. Put it as your desktop photo, or your home page. Use the power of your visual sense to keep you focused on your goal. Because that focus is what will keep you motivated over the long term — once you lose focus, you lose motivation, so having something to keep bringing your focus back to your goal will help keep that motivation.

#16: Get a workout partner or goal buddy. Staying motivated on your own is tough. But if you find someone with similar goals (running, dieting, finances, etc.), see if they'd like to partner with you. Or partner with your spouse, sibling or best friend on whatever goals they're trying to achieve. You don't have to be going after the same goals — as long as you are both pushing and encouraging each other to succeed.

#15: Just get started. There are some days when you don't feel like heading out the door for a run, or figuring out your budget, or whatever it is you're supposed to do that day for your goal. Well, instead of thinking about how hard it is, and how long it will take, tell yourself that you just have to start.

I have a rule (not an original one) that I just have to put on my running shoes and close the door behind me. After that, it all flows naturally. It's when you're sitting in your house, thinking about running and feeling tired, that it seems hard. Once you start, it is never as hard as you thought it would be. This tip works for me every time.

#14: Make it a pleasure. One reason we might put off something that will help us achieve our goal, such as exercise for example, is because it seems like hard work. Well, this might be true, but the key is to find a way to make it fun or pleasurable. If your goal activity becomes a treat, you actually look forward to it. And that's a good thing.

#13: Give it time, be patient. I know, this is easier said than done. But the problem with many of us is that we expect quick results. When you think about your goals, think long term. If you want to lose weight, you may see some quick initial losses, but it will take a long time to lose the rest. If you want to run a marathon, you won't be able to do it overnight. If you don't see the results you want soon, don't give up … give it time. In the meantime, be happy with your progress so far, and with your ability to stick with your goals. The results will come if you give it time.

#12: Break it into smaller, mini goals. Sometimes large or longer-term goals can be overwhelming. After a couple weeks, we may lose motivation, because we still have several months or a year or more left to accomplish the goal. It's hard to maintain motivation for a single goal for such a long time. Solution: have smaller goals along the way.

#11: Reward yourself. Often. And not just for longer-term goals, either. In Hack #12, I talked about breaking larger goals into smaller, mini goals. Well, each of those mini goals should have a reward attached to it. Make a list of your goals, with mini goals, and next to each, write down an appropriate reward. By appropriate, I mean 1) it's proportionate to the size of the goal (don't reward going on a 1-mile run with a luxury cruise in the Bahamas); and 2) it doesn't ruin your goal — if you are trying to lose weight, don't reward a day of healthy eating with a dessert binge. It's self-defeating.

#10: Find inspiration, on a daily basis. Inspiration is one of the best motivators, and it can be found everywhere. Every day, seek inspiration, and it will help sustain motivation over the long term. Sources of inspiration can include: blogs, online success stories, forums, friends and family, magazines, books, quotes, music, photos, people you meet.

#9: Get a coach or take a class. These will motivate you to at least show up, and to take action. It can be applied to any goal. This might be one of the more expensive ways of motivating yourself, but it works. And if you do some research, you might find some cheap classes in your area, or you might know a friend who will provide coaching or counseling for free.

#8: Have powerful reasons. Write them down. Know your reasons. Give them some thought … and write them down. If you have loved ones, and you are doing it for them, that is more powerful than just doing it for self-interest. Doing it for yourself is good too, but you should do it for something that you REALLY REALLY want to happen, for really good reasons.

#7: Become aware of your urges to quit, and be prepared for them. We all have urges to stop, but they are mostly unconscious. One of the most powerful things you can do is to start being more conscious of those urges. A good exercise is to go through the day with a little piece of paper and put a tally mark for each time you get an urge. It simply makes you aware of the urges. Then have a plan for when those urges hit, and plan for it beforehand, and write down your plan, because once those urges hit, you will not feel like coming up with a plan.

#6: Make it a rule never to skip two days in a row.This rule takes into account our natural tendency to miss days now and then. We are not perfect. So, you missed one day … now the second day is upon you and you are feeling lazy … tell yourself NO! You will not miss two days in a row! Zen Habits says so! And just get started. You'll thank yourself later.

#5: Visualize your goal clearly, on a daily basis, for at least 5-10 minutes. Visualize your successful outcome in great detail. Close your eyes, and think about exactly how your successful outcome will look, will feel, will smell and taste and sound like. Where are you when you become successful? How do you look? What are you wearing? Form as clear a mental picture as possible. Now here's the next key: do it every day. For at least a few minutes each day. This is the only way to keep that motivation going over a long period of time.

#4: Keep a daily journal of your goal. If you are consistent about keeping a journal, it can be a great motivator. A journal should have not only what you did for the day, but your thoughts about how it went, how you felt, what mistakes you made, what you could do to improve. To be consistent about keeping a journal, do it right after you do your goal task each day. Make keeping a journal a sensory pleasure.

#3: Create a friendly, mutually-supportive competition.We are all competitive in nature, at least a little. Some more than others. Take advantage of this part of our human nature by using it to fuel your goals. If you have a workout partner or goal buddy, you've got all you need for a friendly competition. See who can log more miles, or save more dollars, each week or month. See who can do more pushups or pullups. See who can lose the most weight or have the best abs or lose the most inches on their waist. Make sure the goals are weighted so that the competition is fairly equal. And mutually support each other in your goals.

#2: Make a big public commitment. Be fully committed. This will do the trick every time. Create a blog and announce to the world that you are going to achieve a certain goal by a certain date. Commit yourself to the hilt.

#1: Always think positive. Squash all negative thoughts. Monitor your thoughts. Be aware of your self-talk. We all talk to ourselves, a lot, but we are not always aware of these thoughts. Start listening. If you hear negative thoughts, stop them, push them out, and replace them with positive thoughts. Positive thinking can be amazingly powerful.

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20 Things I Wish I Had Known When Starting Out in Life

20 Things I Wish I Had Known When Starting Out in Life

This post was taken from Zenhabits

I'm nearly 35 years old, and I've made my share of mistakes in my life. I'm not a big believer in regrets … and I have learned tremendously from every single mistake … and my life is pretty great.

However, there are a few things I wish I had known when I was graduating from high school and starting out as an adult in life.

Would I change things? I'm not so sure. I might never have gotten into a mountain of debt, but then I wouldn't have learned the amazing satisfaction of getting out of it. I might have made better career choices, but then I wouldn't have all the work experience that makes me the blogger and writer that I am today.

I might not have gotten married that first time, so that I would never have gotten divorced … but then I wouldn't have my first two beautiful wonderful incredible children from that first marriage.

I don't think I would change any of that. However, looking back, there are some lessons I've learned that I would probably tell my 18-year-old self. Do I share them now to share my regrets? No, I share them in hopes that younger men and women, just starting out in life, can benefit from my mistakes and my lessons.

What follows isn't an exhaustive list, but it's one that I hope proves useful to at least a few people.

    "I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it." - Jack Handey

   1. How to control impulse spending. If there's anything that got me in trouble financially, it's impulse spending. Buying clothes when I don't need them. Buying gadgets because I gotta have them. Ordering stuff online because it's so easy. Buying that new shiny SUV because … well, because it was going to help me with women. I'm not proud of any of that. I've learned to control my impulses, at least a little better. Now, I give myself some time to breathe. I think over my purchases, see if I've got the money, think about whether it's a need or a want. That would have been a useful tool 15 years ago.

   2. You gotta stay active. I was in track, cross country and basketball in high school, but once I started college, the running and basketball began to slowly fade away. Not right away — I played pick-up basketball for years after high school. But even that went away, until I became sedentary. Playing with my kids outdoors winded me. And I began to get fat. I've reversed that trend, and am very active now, but I'm still trying to burn the fat I gained in those inactive years.

   3. How to plan finances. I always knew that I was supposed to budget and track my spending, when I became an adult. I just was too lazy to do it. And I didn't have a good idea of how to actually do it. Now, I've learned how to plan, and how to stick to that plan. Sure, I deviate from my plan, but I've learned how to handle that too. Maybe that's not a skill you can learn from book reading. You just gotta practice. Well, I hope to teach it to my children before they go out on their own.

   4. Junk food will come back to bite you in the butt. Yeah, it wasn't just the sedentary lifestyle that got me fat. It was all the damn junk food too. I would eat pizza and burgers and Twinkies and sugar cereal and desserts and donuts and … well, you get the picture. As someone used to being able to eat whatever I wanted, it never seemed like it would be a problem. Bad health was something to worry about when you got old. Well, my jeans began to get way too tight, and to my horror, I climbed several pants sizes and developed a gut that only now is going away. I wish someone had shown me an "after" picture when I was young and downing the Big Gulp sodas.

   5. Smoking is just dumb. I didn't start smoking until I was well into my adult years. I won't go into why I started, but it didn't seem like a problem, because I knew I could quit anytime I wanted. Or I thought I could, at least, until several years later I gave it a go and couldn't do it. Five failed quits later and I realized with horror that my addiction was stronger than I was. Sure, I eventually beat the habit (quit date: Nov. 18, 2005) but it took a piece of my soul to do it.

   6. Fund your retirement, son. And don't withdraw it. This piece of wisdom, and probably all the ones above, might seem blisteringly obvious. And they are. Don't think I didn't know this when I was 18. I did. I just didn't pay it serious attention. Retirement was something I could worry about when I was in my 30s. Well, I'm in my 30s now and I wish I could slap that little 18-year-old Leo around a bit. What money I could have invested by now! I had a retirement plan, but on the 3 occasions when I changed jobs, I withdrew that and spent it frivolously.

   7. All the stuff you're doing that seems hard — it will be of use. This is the first one that might not be as obvious. There were times in my life when work was hard, and I did it anyway, but hated it. I did it because I had to, but boy did it stress me out and leave me exhausted. Hard work isn't as easy as I wanted it to be. But you know what? Every bit of hard work I did without knowing why I was doing it … it's paid off for me in the long run. Maybe not right away, but I'm using skills and habits I learned during those times of high stress and long hours and tedious work — I use them all the time, and they've made me into the person I am today. Thank you, younger Leo!

   8. Don't buy that used van without checking it out closely. I thought I was being smart by buying used, but I didn't check it out carefully enough. That dang van had loads of engine problems, a door that nearly fell off when I was driving, a door handle that snapped off, a side mirror that fell off, no spare tire despite three tires that were ready to blow (and did), windows that didn't roll up, rattling noises, an eventual blown radiator … I could go on and on, but let's just say that it wasn't my best purchase. I still think buying used is smart, but check things out closely first.

   9. That guy you're going to sell your car to? On a gentleman's agreement? He's not gonna pay you. I sold another car to a friend of a friend, who I was sure would pay me even if I had nothing in writing. That was smart. I still see the guy once in awhile on the road, but I don't have the energy to do a U-turn and chase after him.

  10. Make time to pursue your passion, no matter how busy you are. I've always wanted to be a writer, and get a book published. I just never had time to write. With a family and school and a full-time job, there just weren't enough hours in the day. Well, I've learned that you have to make those hours. Set aside a block of time to do what you love, cut out other stuff from your life that take up your time, and don't let anything interfere with that work. If I had done that 15 years ago, I could have 15 books written by now. Not all would be great, but still.

  11. All that stuff that's stressing you out — it won't matter in 5 years, let alone 15. When things are happening to you right now, they mean all the world. I had deadlines and projects and people breathing down my neck, and my stress levels went through the roof. I don't regret the hard work (see above) but I think I would have been less stressed if I could have just realized that it wouldn't matter a single bit just a few years down the road. Perspective is a good thing to learn.

  12. The people you make friends with are so much more important than your job or the things you buy. I've had a few jobs, I've bought a lot of things, and I've made a few friends over these last 15 years. Of those, the only thing that still matter to me are the friends. And I wish I could have spent more time with friends (and family) than on the other things.

  13. All that time you spend watching TV is a huge, huge waste of time. I don't know how much TV I've watched over the years, but it's a crapload. Hours and days and weeks I'll never have back. Who cares what happens on reality TV, when reality is slipping by outside? Time is something you'll never get back — don't waste it on TV.

  14. Your kids are going to grow up way faster than you think. Don't waste a minute. I just had an Oh My God moment recently. My oldest daughter, Chloe, is 14 going on 15 next month. I have 3 years left with her before she leaves my house and becomes an adult. Three years! I am floored by that single fact, because it really doesn't seem anywhere near enough time. I want to go back to my younger self and whack that younger Leo on the head and say Stop working so hard! Stop watching TV! Spend more time with your kids! These last 15 years with Chloe (and my other wonderful kids) have gone by much, much too fast.

  15. Forget the drama. Focus on being happy. There have been many things that have happened to me, professionally and personally, that seem like the end of the world. And while these things were bad, they get blown up in our heads so that they become major drama. They caused me to be depressed from time to time. What a waste of time. If I realized that it was all in my head, and that I could be happy instead if I focused on the positive, on what I did have, and what I could be doing … I could have skipped all the moping about.

  16. Pay more attention to blogs when you first hear about them. They're more than just journals. I first read about blogs 7-8 years ago, but when I took a look at them they didn't seem like anything of interest. Just some people's journals about stuff they read on the web. Why would I want to read those? I have my own thoughts about the web, but I don't need to share them with the world. I spent a lot of time on the Internet, on various sites and forums, but every time I happened upon a blog I would brush past it without interest. It wasn't until a couple years ago that I discovered what wonderful things they could be (I mentioned some of my early favorites in my list of influences). If I had gotten into blogging years ago … well, I wouldn't have been wasting all that time.

  17. Speaking of which, keep a journal. Seriously. Your memory is extremely faulty. I forget things really easily. Not short-term stuff, but long-term. I don't remember things about my kids' early years, because I didn't record any of it. I don't remember things about my life. It's like a lot of foggy memories that I'll never have access to. I wish I had kept a journal.

  18. Tequila is seriously evil. I won't go into details, but it should suffice to say that I had some bad experiences, and I'm not sure I learned very much from them or benefited in any way except to learn that tequila is the drink of the Devil.

  19. Yes, you can do a marathon. Don't put this goal off — it's extremely rewarding. Running a marathon had always been a dream of mine, since high school … something I wanted to do but thought was out of reach. Or if I ever did it, it would be years and years later. Well, I learned that it's not only achievable, it's incredibly rewarding. I wish I had started training when I was young and light and fit … I could have had some good finishing times!

  20. All these mistakes you're going to make, despite this advice? They're worth it. My 18-year-old self would probably have read this post and said, "Good advice!" And then he would have proceeded to make the same mistakes, despite good intentions. I was a good kid, but I wasn't good at following advice. I had to make my own mistakes, and live my own life. And that's what I did, and I don't regret a minute of it. Every experience I've had (even the tequila ones) have led me down the path of life to where I am today. I love where I am today, and wouldn't trade it for another life for all the world. The pain, the stress, the drama, the hard work, the mistakes, the depression, the hangovers, the debt, the fat … it was all worth it.

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